Friday, August 7, 2009

Random Crap

My children are freakin' exhibitionists. They cannot potty or shower or bathe with the door closed. I'm sure their habits formed when it was just the three of us in our little apartment during the time I was divorced. Any mom knows that when you have little ones, shutting the door to potty isn't a reality. I find myself leaving it open now when it's just Harley and me at home. I should change my ways right now.

So I was at the E Center the other night working in the Rib City concessions stand and I needed to go...number 2. Now, like pretty much every female I know, this is a home-seater event. But as I was far from home, I was going to have to do this in the public restroom. So i go in there and there's easily 20 stalls along one wall and then another 5 or so across the aisle. So I put myself in the far corner, very end stall to ensure the most privacy. Let me also point out that this restroom was at the end of a very long hall and was getting very little traffic. So I sit myself down and prepare to...y'know...go. Not one minute into it did someone come in and sit RIGHT NEXT TO ME!!! "What the crap??" (No pun intended.) (Yes, it was.), I think to myself. "This woman has the ENTIRE restroom to choose from and she has to sit right by me when I'm doing this." Duh!!!

Do you have any "blog friends" that you've never met but you really want to meet because you're certain you'd be great friends? And you sometimes daydream about having her live next to you, so your kids could play and you and she could hang out and laugh because you just KNOW you've got the same personalities and the same sense of humor and you really don't have any friends that live by you that you can just totally be yourself with but you KNOW you could be with this friend? Ya, me neither.

My baby isn't really a baby anymore. I mean, he is. But he doesn't have that baby look anymore. He doesn't walk yet and for the past month I've just been ready for him to walk. He gets everywhere he wants to go, anyway. I'd just like him to walk there! Well, now I'm thinking I'll be sad when he walks. That's a huge milestone for a baby! Toddlers walk. Not babies. (Except my nephew, who walked at 7 1/2 months.) And since I'm not having anymore babies (it's true, mom), it kinda makes me sad to think about my last baby taking his first steps.

School starts in less than two weeks. I go into almost complete hysterics when I think about this. Here in Utah we got hugely ripped off during June because it rained the whole freakin' month. Then we have a bumload of holidays in July which makes it go by fast and now school is about to start. I pretty much have a panic attack when I think of getting up early and getting the kids ready for school. Doing breakfast and homework and bedtime. Ugh. I've got to stop thinking about it.

I was all by myself last Saturday (bliss!) so I went to see Harry Potter (shut up). They turn you loose with the butter for the popcorn. They've got a dispenser and you can just load your popcorn up! So I had her fill it up half way with popcorn, then I buttered, then had her fill the rest of the bag with popcorn, then I buttered some more. Well, guess what? The movie theater owes me a new pair of shorts because I got butter all over mine. They should know better than to leave me to my own devices when it comes to movie-theater popcorn and butter.

Ever since I discovered how to update my facebook profile status via text message, I've become really narcissistic. Like every move I make I feel like I want to fb it! As if anyone gives a damn! "Amber is...going to change the laundry." "Amber is...gonna have a Pepsi." "Amber is...the most self absorbed person ever to walk the earth." These thoughts run through my brain All. Day. Long.

I need new jeans.


Kristina P. said...

That's right! I forgot you went to Harry Potter on your own. And your little man is so cute.

I hope the bathroom situation turned out well. When do I get to see you?!?!

And I'm pretty sure that dream was before you met me, and then after you did, you realized I was even more awesome than in your dream./

Vanessa said...

I was all excited that you might be fantasizing about me :)

DeNae said...

What is the deal with people and public restrooms? I think they should have YARDS of space between every stall. I know it would be hard on half of Congress, but the rest of us would be much happier.

Harley is still a baby. He is. Say it. SAY HE'S STILL A BABY!!!

And mom reads your blog? Cuz I'm pretty sure she boycotts mine.

Casey said...

Awwwwwwwww, thanks. There are a few houses in my neighborhood, I'd love to have you nearby.

It never fails that someone comes to the stall next to me too, I HATE it.

I know Harley is till a baby but I get what you mean by him not being one. Same thing with Elliot, she's so freaking grown up these days.

Need me to send you some real estate listings?

tammy said...

I love random posts. I learn so much.

The past two times we've been to the movies, my hubs and my son have gotten butter on the back of their shirts just from sitting in the seats. I'm still not sure how that happened.

The whole FB thing used to bug me, but now I'm kind of into it.

Motherboard said...

There are a couple of houses for sale in my neighborhood... you could TWO friends for the price of one. Just sayin'.

Public bathrooms STRESS ME OUT!

M-Cat said...

OMGosh I love the random stuff. I used to be a home court kind of girl, but then you get old and quit caring..... : )

Michael, Dlaina & Ethan Lindsay said...

you are probably the funniest person I know, SERIOUSLY!

and you aren't having any more babies what's up with that I thought you were gonna have one more?

and p.s. when are we going to do lunch?

Sher said...

I LOVE all your randomness. So, when the person walked into the bathroom, since you wait until they left before you finished your business? That's what I would do if someone came in during....well.

Why is it so embarrassing to poop? Everybody does it. So why do we try to pretend we don't?

It's just silly.

So, how DO you FB by text message?